Hello. This is Lester Burnham from Media Monthly magazine. I'm calling for Mr. Tamblin, please.
Well, we're all under a deadline here.
You see, there's some basic information... about your product launch that isn't even covered in your press release,
and I'd-- Yeah, c-- can I ask you a question?
Who is Tamblin? Does he exist?
'Cause he doesn't ever seem to come in.
Yeah. Okay. I'll leave my number. It's 555-0199.
Lester Burnham. Thank you!
Hey, Les. You got a minute?
For you, Brad, I got five!
So, yeah, I'm sure you can understand our need to cut corners around here.
Oh, sure. Times are tight. You got to free up some cash.
-You got to spend money to make money. Right? -Exactly.
Like the time that Mr. Flournoy used the company MasterCard to pay for that hooker,
and she used the card numbers and stayed at the St. Regis for, what was it, three months?
-That's unsubstantiated gossip. -That's $50,000.
That's somebody's salary. That's somebody who's going to get fired because Craig has to pay women to fuck him!
Jesus! I mean, calm down.
Nobody's getting fired yet.
That's why we're having everyone... write out a job description mapping out in detail how they contribute.
That way management can assess who's valuable-- And who's expendable.
It's just business.
I've been writing for this magazine for 14 years.
You've been here how long? A whole month?
I'm one of the good guys, Les.
I'm trying to level with you.
This is your one chance to save your job.
There is no decision. You just write the damn thing.
You don't think it's weird and kind of fascist?
Possibly. But you don't want to be unemployed.
All right. Let's just all sell our souls and work for Satan 'cause it's more convenient that way.
Oh, could you be a little bit more dramatic, please, huh?
So, we finally got new neighbors.
You know, if the Lomans had let me represent them instead of the Real Estate King, that house would never have sat on the market for six months.
Well, they were still mad at you for cutting down their sycamore.
Their sycamore?
Come on. A substantial portion of the root structure was on our property.
You know that. How can you call it their sycamore?
I wouldn't have the heart to just cut down something if it wasn't partially mine, which, of course, it was.
Mom, do we always have to listen to this elevator music?
No. No, we don't.
And as soon you've prepared a nutritious yet savory meal that I'm about to eat, you can listen to whatever you like.
-So, Janie, how was school? -It was okay.
Just okay?
No, Dad. It was spectacular.
Well, you want to know how things went in my job today?
They've hired this efficiency expert,
this really friendly guy named Brad-- How perfect is that?
And he's basically there to make it seem they're justified... in firing somebody, because they couldn't just come out and say that, could they?
No, no. That would just be too honest. So they've asked us-- You couldn't possibly care less, could you?
What do you expect?
You can't all of a sudden be my best friend just because you had a bad day.
I mean, hello, you've barely even spoken to me for months.
Oh, what? You're "Mother of the Year"?
-You treat her like an employee. -What?
I'm going to get some ice cream.
Janie... I'm sorry I haven't been more available.
I'm just-- I--
You know, you don't always have to wait for me to come to you.
Oh, great. So now it's my fault?
I didn't say that. It's nobody's fault. It--
Janie, what happened?
We used to be pals.